Reflections on Life

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A Parable of Contrast

Occasionally, an idea or parable or story will just drop into my awareness – fully baked, meaning, I don’t have to think about it or edit it in any way.  It is perfect pure creation the minute it is perceived.   The following came to me today as I was driving to my office to see a client.  I dictated it into my phone in a single take – adjectives, dialog and all.  It was truly a stunning experience.  I know I channel greater wisdom when I get out of the way, so the fact that it happened was no surprise.  Yet the relevance of the topic, the poignant nature of what came through, and how easy it came through suggests it was intended for a larger audience.  I hope it speaks to you in some way too.


Two old friends met on a path one day and took a walk in the cool autumn air.  The crunch of the colorful fall leaves echoed throughout the fragrant forest and set the cadence for their step and conversation.

“The trees are so bare this time of year and the forest creatures and birds scarcely have enough to shield themselves from the elements,” said Scarcity.

“Yet there is a festive bounty of leaves beneath our feet that yields protection while the bare trees provide ample exposure to the warmth of the sun. One could imagine that the little creatures can see better now than ever before their food and their delights,”  replied Abundance.

“And the days are growing shorter,” observed Scarcity, “there’s hardly enough light in the day to find what they need to survive the cold coming winter.”

“Yet,” replied Abundance, “somehow their bodies know to instinctively store fat and nutrients now to carry them through to the generosity of spring.”

“They’re running out of time,” remarked Scarcity.  “It’s only a matter of time before they become someone else’s preparation.”

“Yes, there’s plenty of that going around,” replied Abundance.  “And for this, we are grateful as it inspires evolution and gives life to the great thinkers, great do-ers and great be-ers of the next generation.  For this cycle, is the cause of the abundance of species and the cause of the abundance of adaptations to their survival. ”

Abundance and Scarcity stopped on the path, and under the colorful canopy speckled with sunlight, smiled warmly at each other.  The moment was filled with acceptance and appreciation even in light of their different views of the world – just what you would expect of old friends.  They walked for some time into the sunset, enjoying the unadulterated silence of the simple awareness of each other until they came to the inevitable fork in the path where they would part ways, just as they have done many times before.

“Thank you, old friend,” said Abundance, “without you, I would not know myself.”

Scarcity smiled.  “Thank you, my friend.  It is through you, that I know myself better.”

And with gratitude and thanks, each turned and continued down their respective paths into the reality of their own creation, until such time as their paths would invariably and joyfully cross again.


By and through experiences with things, people, ideas and circumstance which you are not, you discover and reinforce who you are.  Be grateful for everything, everyone and every moment.  It’s all teaching you something precious about yourself.

Living Clean in ’17

One resolution. Just one. What if you could whittle it down to one resolution?

Maybe you would embrace something like “Show more love.” Maybe you would announce you are going to “Be more positive.” Maybe you would lock in something dynamic that would create seismic shift in your life. And why not? It’s exciting to make resolutions. It draws out a sense of hope and positivity as we look forward to the wonderful byproducts of driving toward a goal. It’s a part of our nature to dream and look forward to our future.

Yet, inevitably, within a few weeks of our great proclamation, we forget. We lose momentum. We create caveats and expose exceptions to the resolution such that it becomes less of a resolution and more like a nice idea. No blame or shame. That’s part of our nature too.
So, let’s not make it so hard. This year, why not join me in making one simple resolution. One easy, simple and refined point of view through which to filter our thoughts, actions, behaviors and choices. This year, why not join me in “Living Clean in ’17.” That’s it. A single resolution to make “Living Clean” a daily practice.

Of course, you’ll have to take a minute to think about what “Clean” means to you. Perhaps Clean is a vibration. Perhaps it’s a sense of purity or simplicity. Perhaps it’s an awareness of alignment or truth. Whatever it is for you, there’s a good chance you will know what “Clean” is for you, when you consider “Dirty.” You probably have some good examples of “Living Dirty” to use as contrast.
We will all have different definitions of “Clean” but that shouldn’t stop anyone from playing along. Living Clean of Mind can easily include allowing other people to live their own definition of “Clean.”

And to make it even easier, how about directing that “Living Clean” resolution to the three key facets of our lives – Mind, Body and Spirit.  Here are some ideas to get your started along with a handy thought / behavior filter.

Simply ask yourself. . . .”Is this choice, thought, action, food ‘clean’ for me?”

If it creates or cultivates a Clean

[Mind, Body, Spirit], repeat it.

If it doesn’t create or cultivate a Clean [Mind, Body, Spirit], release it.

Living Clean in Mind
• releasing limiting mental images and stories / creating empowering mental images and stories
• removing yourself from dirty external ideas and images / ingesting clean ideas and images

Living Clean in Body
• releasing poisons and toxins / ingesting high value natural clean fuel
• releasing manufactured chemicals / embracing natural products
• releasing physical abuse / cherishing your body

Living Clean in Spirit
• releasing judgement / filtering through love
• releasing doubt / embracing faith and positive expectancy

In the course of a day, there are thousands of opportunities for “Living Clean.” You may not nail every decision, every day. That’s okay. Don’t be so hard on yourself (Living Clean of Mind). Each experience holds a new opportunity for Living Clean. The goal is simply to create and collect more evidence of “Living Clean” than “Living Dirty,” so that when you look back on 2017, evidence of “Living Clean” will be all you see.

Pop on over to Facebook and join the discussion with the “Living Clean in ’17” community. As you NOW become more and more mindful of Living Clean in all areas of your life. Share your ah-has, insights and inspirations with the group and please be sure to use the hashtag #livingcleanin17 in your post and let us know if it’s Clean of Mind, Clean of Body, or Clean of Spirit.

This might be the one resolution that finally brings you the Powerful Positive Change you’ve been seeking.

Finding Commonality in Random Things – Kale & Hypnosis

Kale is more popular than ever. Maybe this is news to you, or maybe you are reading this from the front row seat of the Kale-Wagon. Or maybe, like me, you are just making it through your first bag of green leafy goodness. Either way, like it, love it, tolerate or hate it, you might be surprised to learn the 3 ways in which Kale is like Hypnosis.

1. It’s Been Around For A Long Time:
• Kale: The dark, leafy green has been a staple on dinner plates since Roman times and has long been common across much of Europe. The plant is thought to have originated in Asia Minor and to have been brought to Europe around 600 B.C. by groups of Celtic wanderers.
• Hypnosis: Although the word “hypnosis” wasn’t even coined until the mid-1800’s, hypnosis has its origin in the Ancient Sleep temples of Egypt and the Oracles of Greece. Divining answers, creating perspective and connecting to inner wisdom through a lucid sleep-like state has been a regularly accepted practice across the globe since before the dawn of time.

2. It’s Commonly Regarded As A “Break Glass In Case of Emergency” Thing:
• Kale: Let’s face it. Kale would probably be your last choice of leafy greens – after you had tried EVERYTHING else in the produce section. If your local grocery store was out of iceberg, romaine, and spinach, you’d still likely choose one of Kale’s cousins – cabbage, broccoli or cauliflower before tossing the big fluffy bag in your cart – that is, of course, unless you needed a garnish for your fried macaroni and cheese balls.
• Hypnosis: It’s not a scientific study, but I have observed that 9 out of 10 people who come to my office, answer the “why hypnosis” question in a very predictable way – “because I’ve tried everything else and nothing else worked.” Folks will ingest chemicals, have parts removed, have parts augmented, consult this professional, attend that workshop, subject themselves to poke, prod and pulse before trying Hypnosis. And then, it’s on a dare or in a group setting so the risk is low.

3. It’s Really, Really Good For You:
• Kale: So I had to look this up on Web MD because perhaps I’m still trying to make it taste better in my mind by highlighting the actual nutritional value. Kale is considered a “super food” because of its dense and concentrated delivery of a wide range of “essentials” fundamental to our organic survival. One cup of raw kale has nearly 3 grams of protein, 2.5 grams of fiber, Vitamins A, C, and K, Folate, a B vitamin (key for brain development), Alpha-linolenic acid, and minerals including phosphorus, potassium, calcium, and zinc. It has more Vitamin C than an orange. Whoa. . .stores should just shelve it next to the Flintstone’s Multivitamin and call it a day.
• Hypnosis: You can’t really go into the hypnotic state without agreeing to go there. So, your hypnosis session (whether in the office or at home listening to a recording) is really a choice – your choice. And in exercising your choice, you empower yourself to access your mind to activate focus in the same way a magnifying glass focuses and intensifies sunlight. While in the state, you explore and bring to consciousness barriers, blocks and underlying motivations and then generate and amplify mental images that illustrate positive change. And, the duration of the sessions and length of process is often shorter (and less expensive) than other change work modalities, yet yield lasting impact on our mental and emotional wellbeing. Hypnosis – the kale of change work modalities.  Densely concentrated delivery of dynamic internal change that has lasting impact on our survival. That’s good. Really, really good.

So, if you enjoy kale, woo hoo for you! You might enjoy joining the 50 Shades of Kale movement and explore just how versatile and flexible a food it really is. (I personally recommend Cheezy Kale Chips. You’ll thank me.) If you want to take advantage of all of the incredible benefits of foods like kale, good news – there’s hypnosis for that. Hypnosis can absolutely help you shift your perception and cultivate a “taste” for healthy food choices. If that’s what you want.

If you don’t like kale and you are tired of your friends and family members trying to sneak it into your protein shakes or salads, good news – there’s hypnosis for that too (for you, not them.) Hypnosis is a flexible, versatile tool for transforming many of life’s challenges, big or small. It can help you cultivate compassion, understanding, love, allowance and forgiveness for folks who see the world different from you; folks who have positive intentions but sometimes disparaging execution. How does it get any better than that?

I wonder. . . if we can find commonality in two random things like kale and hypnosis, can we perhaps find commonality in each other? That would be good for you us too. Really, really good.

Doing The Best We Can. . .

. . . With The Resources We Have

If you live in the Sarasota, Bradenton, I-4 Corridor area, then you know what a crazy evening of weather we had last night. The night sky was lit up by a spectacular electric light show – vibrant pinks and purples illuminated by mythic bolts of lightening you think were hurled by Zeus himself. And the rain. I have never seen so much rain. There was so much rain that it just puddled on I-75 making driving the familiar interstate more like navigating a rushing fiord. And it was this way for miles and miles. My car is a small two-seater and lower to the ground than your average sedan – in an average rain, I am close to floating on the road anyway. So, I drove at least 40 miles cinched up to the front of the steering wheel fixed on the road at dusk in about 50 feet of visibility. Everyone was driving about 25 miles per hour – you couldn’t go much faster without the water under your car splashing up onto your own windshield. My heart was pumping and I was scared, excited and at the same time grateful for the collective care all of the drivers demonstrated under these conditions.

I thought about what I would tell my daughter Olivia, my fledgling driver, about how to navigate this situation. “Just stay in your lane,” I thought, “keep a slow and consistent speed. Don’t worry about others who want to go faster than you, just do what you need to do to be safe. Do the best you can for your skill level and your equipment. If you don’t feel comfortable, pull over or exit and wait it out.”

As these thoughts were crossing my consciousness, I became aware of a large vehicle closing in to the right and behind me at a significant speed – at least 55mph, which compared to my 25mph, felt like a torpedo. It was a large truck – a oversized pick-up. We’re talking the top of the tires aligned with my roof. I wasn’t really worried about him. Considering the size of the truck, I snickered, “yeah, the road conditions aren’t as bad up there. Those tires are mammoth. He can handle that speed.” But my attitude changed as he started to pass me. The volume of water wicked up through the tires created a wave that hit my car with such force that I hydroplaned and was blinded by the volume of water on the windshield. Righting the car and regaining my composure, I started in with a few choice expletives as I watched the truck continue up the road having the same impact on car after car ahead of me. “He’s dangerous. He has no clue about how he’s affecting other cars on the road,” I thought. “I wish I could catch up to him and let him know what he’s leaving in his wake – literally.” Then I realized an important caveat to that advice I would give Olivia “Do the best you can for your skill level and your equipment and be mindful about how your choices and behavior affect other people.”

A few moments later, I had the insight – isn’t this the case with so many areas of our lives? We navigate the world doing the best we can with the resources we have while interacting with others – sometimes our “best” includes this mindfulness and sometimes our “best” doesn’t even resemble anything folks would call “best” much less mindful. How often do we stop and observe our own behavior and question the impact on others?

Truth, we’re all like that truck driver every now and then. We plough through conditions as we perceive them, doing what we feel is safe and appropriate for us, yet in doing so, we leave people in our wake, annoyed, confused, angry or hurt. And we never know the true impact of what we’ve done until someone catches up to us and lets us know. Yeah, and that never feels good.

Perhaps there is an opportunity to create awareness and be mindful in every moment, on every road we travel, so that we may all navigate challenging “weather” safely. We all deserve to get to our destination with the utmost care.

Food for thought.

Abundance is Waiting at Your Door

Sometimes things drop down inside my head out of no-where and bring beautiful little nuggets of wisdom. This little gem came to me as I was sitting in line at Chick-Fil-a waiting for nuggets of a different kind. Normally, I can expect terrible cell phone reception in the drive through, if any at all. This time, it seems, I was receiving a completely different type of signal.

Knock, knock.

Me: Who’s there?

The Universe.

Me: The Universe who?

The Universe that is conspiring to provide you abundance, wealth, love and a hot body.

Me: Excellent! I have been waiting for you. Where have you been?

I’ve been out here the whole time.

Me: You have? Why didn’t you knock louder?

Why do you keep the door shut so much?

Me: I can’t just keep opening the door to see who’s out here? That would be a waste of time.

Why not just get rid of the door? Then I wouldn’t have to knock and you could see me all the time.

Me: But, then things could get in that I don’t want.

I only bring things you focus on.

Me: But, I’ve seen things get in that I don’t want.

Yes, because I only bring things you focus on.

Me: Hmm. Good point.

So, can I come in now?

Me: Well, you could but all of a sudden, I’m afraid to let you in.


Me: I’m afraid my house is too small for you and all you now bring me.

That’s okay, I brought a demolition team.


Sometimes it’s scary to open up to all of the abundance that the universe has available to us. The greatest thing to overcome is your belief that you need a door and that your house may be too small to handle all that awaits you. Let go, and welcome in all that you deserve.

5 Reasons to Fall in Love With Fall

7709548_mSo, raise your hand if you are already starting to stress about Thanksgiving Dinner, presents under the tree, out-of-town guests, money, relatives, and resolutions. Don’t be shy. There’s no shame in feeling like you have to start project managing the holiday season as soon as the Halloween Candy bowl is empty. For many of us, this time of year can feel like a hug. . . followed by a slap. . .and then another hug. . . and another slap. For as much as there is to love about this beautiful time of year, let’s face it, there is so much to want to avoid. Perhaps this has caused you to fall OUT OF LOVE with Fall. Perhaps your love for Fall has eroded away and been replaced by a feeling of impending doom. Well then, you might just be human with a very efficient subconscious motivated to protect you from repeating uncomfortable scenes and situations of your past. Subby’s best chance of protecting you is to usher in this time of year with a good measure of anxiety to overshadow the excitement, and to do it earlier and earlier each year. It’s the safest way to “protect” you from experiencing those scenes and situations again. Right?

So, what can we do? We can’t crawl into a hole and we don’t need “tools” like food, medication, alcohol or shopping to get through this time. What we need is a reframe – a way to think about Fall differently. A few reasons to fall in love with Fall again.

Little girl got an idea final

I have worked hard over the years to reframe Fall. As a kid, Fall was frequently marked by a move – usually in early November. Start school in one city, move after Halloween and do Thanksgiving and Christmas in a new home each year. And that was coupled with shuffling between the homes of parents, grandparents, step-grandparents and extended family – hours on the road, familiar settings and a few awkward scenes and with awkward people you were related to on paper, but had no connection to in real life. As a result, Fall sometimes feels like something I want to avoid. My subconscious still “tracks” to this time of year, slowly ticking like hands on a clock, inching closer and closer to midnight. This time of year, my body actually feels like it’s on the verge of something.

I could just muddle through it, but I choose to reframe it because I know there is tremendous value in changing my perspective and swapping out old filters for how I see my world. Instead of being consumed by the negative vibe, I use that feeling as a trigger – a reminder to let go of old ideas (of myself, others and situations) – to breathe and welcome in fresh a perspective of love and gratitude for whatever is coming. I give myself a reason to fall in love with Fall.

In case you too are struggling with this time of year, I offer 5 Reasons to reframe how you feel so you can reap the benefit of this truly inspiring time of year.

5721483_m1. Fall is a time of reflection. It’s the perfect time to review the past year and see what worked, and what didn’t work and what changes you want to make. You may have an idea about where you think you are going in the new year, but if you don’t reflect on where you’ve been and where you are, you don’t know what you need to do to get to where you want to be. If you reflect in the spirit of continual process (or whole person) improvement, there is no blame or shame for where you are, or what happened over the year. You can simply look at those data points as feedback for helping you grow, let them go, and embrace a knowing you are NOW implementing change moving forward. Kinda creates a feeling of being cleansed and renewed. Thank you Fall, for taking out the trash. I love having a fresh house.

18160724_m2. Fall is a time to engage the senses. It’s rich with vibrant, beautiful colors. It’s cooler. The earthy fragrance of moist soil and waning leaves fill the air. There is a crispness that permeates the air that you can almost taste – yes, even down here in Florida. The seasonal shopping bustle and jovial music echo the sentiment of our hearts. This time of year is full of sensory activation and the subconscious LOVES this – it’s fertile ground for it to connect to patterns of behavior. The senses activate little movies in our mind – from the past and from the future. Things you have seen, things you want to see (and even things you DON’T want to see). And the subconscious knows exactly which behaviors can play out in those movies – behaviors that produce a positive result (think remaining calm when Aunt Sally is visiting) and behaviors that DON’T serve you (think clearing out the Halloween candy bowl). Yet, the subconscious is always looking to create new little movies and you can help steer it toward creating more movies that serve you by simply engaging your senses. If you connect positive sensory experiences to positive, empowering thoughts and images you can enjoy positive, empowering behavior. It’s really that simple. Its’ a unique time of year, so, get out there and immerse yourself in the multiple sensory experiences available and make some new exciting movies about your life. Thank you Fall, for reminding me, I can change the channel.

5139556_m3. Fall is a time of transformation. Nature embarks on an incredible transition this time of year. Think about it. . .trees drop their leaves not because trees are dying, but because they are conserving energy and resources for the coming winter (when there is less rain and water) and preparing for the creation of new life in the spring. If a tree was to resist this process, it would surely die – it would get in the way of its own ability to thrive. Effectively, a tree chooses to participate in this transition and let go of things it held on to with vigilance earlier in the year, in favor of the promise of something it won’t see or reap the benefit from for months. That’s the safest thing for a tree to do. As a species, humans don’t embrace this idea very well. This kind of things makes humans crazy – doing something NOW to enjoy a future payoff? Are you serious? I want to be skinny NOW. I need to be wealthy NOW. What nature does makes no conscious sense. That’s because, nature isn’t conscious. It’s the quintessential subconscious mind — things happening behind the scenes and on a cellular, atomic and subatomic level for its highest good. Perhaps, this time of year, we can learn a lesson from nature and learn to embrace transition. Learn to choose and go with the flow of change instead of resist. Put our energy in the right place – the place that serves growth and investment in our ultimate highest good. I can surely fall in love with the idea of letting go of things I don’t need in favor of setting the stage for a better me. Thank you Fall. I’m loving you more and more every day.

9291788_m4. Fall is a time to connect. Biologically, humans are homing beacons for connection. Every cell is both transmitting and receiving data related to connection, because connection is key to survival. Safety in numbers, right? Some anthropologists even believe that the expression of our genes and the complexity of our brains evolved from the need to manage these connections. The change in the amount of light that accompanies this season can signal organisms to perceive decreased opportunity to make these connections, mate and ultimately reproduce. This time of year, though we might feel like snuggling up on the couch in front of the fire, we are actually subconsciously driven to do it with someone else for the sake of our wellbeing. And for a good reason. There is danger in loneliness. In fact, studies show that when our need for connect is not met, we degrade mentally and physically. So, you think being around dad and cousin Bob causes you stress? Consider the simple stress of long term loneliness including documented cases of eroding arteries, high blood pressure, and memory loss, motor skills loss, and even dementia. Connection results in button pushing for sure, but button pushing can lead to growth if you let it and at least you will be ALIVE. Nature and biology are telling you to connect. It’s healthy to connect. Fall is trying to help you. It’s trying to remind you of the urgency to connect as if your life depends on it, because truthfully, it DOES. Thank you Fall, you are a good friend.

9540437_m5. Fall is a time to be grateful.
With so many opportunities to reflect, connect, transform, and engage yourself and your senses for the sake of your survival, why does a feeling of discontent accompany Fall? Sadly, this season ignites our human tendency to hope, wish and long for something new – something different. But the energy of “HOPING,” “WISHING,” and “LONGING” is not the NOW. It’s energy that resists the NOW and the flow of this current moment. Think back to the tree. A tree doesn’t really put any energy into what’s going to happen in the spring, it just does what it needs to do NOW to the best of it’s ability and trusts that the right thing will happen in spring. It’s just living in this moment – thinking “I’m thriving. I’m the best darn tree.” That’s the essence of contentment — the energy of gratitude. And from a Law of Attraction point of view, this energy is precisely what attracts more moments to be grateful for. That’s why nature persists as it does. That’s why trees live so long if undisturbed. They are in the NOW, grateful and attracting all the things they need to thrive for many more years to come. Hmmm. . .as in nature so too in humanity? Is it possible? Thank you Fall, for this reminder to be grateful for my ability to thrive if I get out of my own way.

10292544_mIf you’re like me, right about now, you’re feeling a bit like running out the door, jumping in a pile of leaves, rolling around shouting “I’m in Love, I’m in Love and I don’t care who knows it!” What better way to express your love for the season that has taught you so much by simply being all that it is. Doing the very best it can. Just being Fall. I love you Fall.

Doing Better Than Just “Getting By” During the Holidays

December 9, 2014

The holidays typically offer an interesting mix of joy and wonder combined with a healthy dose of toleration neatly tied up in a bow of humility. Even if extended family isn’t involved, where there are gatherings, there are expectations. Where there are expectations, there is opportunity for frustration because rarely do people or situations ever quite live up to our expectations.

So usually, this time of year, many of us are anxiously planning our strategy for “getting by;” arming ourselves with defensive comebacks and early exit plans. But what if you could go into the holidays with calm assuredness that everything will be okay and trusting that you can not only handle what happens, but you can do it with compassion, acceptance and love? Take a minute and breathe that one in. Doesn’t your body feel better already?

Well it’s absolutely possible if you engage, one of the basic laws of the mind – “that which is expected, tends to be realized.” If you go into this holiday season with some different expectations, you CAN really experience something you can handle and feel good about. It’s not denial. It’s called re-framing and it’s easier than you think. Start with the base idea that the “characters” you anticipate running into are just doing the best they can with their given resources. Then expect to see that “best” in everything they do – not the worst.

That may be a challenge knowing Cousin Bob is notorious for knocking back one to many over dinner, or that Aunt Susan is the family gossip. You may think “how could that possibly be their best?” Still, when you change your idea about what you expect to see, you change your filter for what you will see. Consequently, the experience changes for you. Their “best” doesn’t really change, rather, how you perceive it changes. It doesn’t mean you allow inappropriate behavior, it just means that in those moments, you expect to give the kind of compassion and understanding that gives this “season of giving” it’s name.

Observe how having this positive expectation in advance, allows you to extend compassion for those “characters.” Anxious feelings fade, and you can visualize your ability to connect to the resources you need to truly handle everything with that calm assuredness. Expect the best of yourself this holiday season and so too will it be realized.

Want more information about how to transform relationships through NLP, Hypnosis and Life Coaching, click here.  There’s time to squeeze in a few sessions before the family comes to town.

Happy Holidays!

Perspective thy name is . . . . . “$1000 Worth of Damage”

November 17, 2014

This morning, after dropping my daughter off at school, I performed the usual Monday morning ritual – that of grocery shopping for the week. The dinner menu and grocery list in hand, I headed into the major retailer down the street dressed in a sweatshirt, yoga pants and ugg boots. Yeah, I’m THAT girl. Just a quick stop, in and out, and then back home to prepare for Monday’s clients. I wasn’t there but 20 or 30 minutes before I was back home with my stash. On my way to unload the trunk, I noticed what looked like mud on my rear driver’s side panel, much to my dismay as I had just treated “Zippy” to a car wash on Saturday. Upon closer inspection, I realized that it wasn’t dirt after all. It was pieces of dangling black paint and white transfer paint from the car that had apparently gotten too close for comfort in the store parking lot. Stepping back to take in the bigger picture. . . yeah. . . a dent too. “Bummer,” I thought “Guess I’m not going to make it to my dentist appointment this morning“ followed by a sigh of relief. “The universe works in mysterious ways,” I smiled. 

I brought in the groceries and called the retailer who informed me that while the video surveillance tape is available, I would have to file a police report before we could look at it. So I called the Sheriff and went through all the steps to file the report. Then, a quick 15 minutes online to file a report with the insurance company.

I continued to process my feelings about the situation while trying to get on with my morning routine. I transitioned through all the emotions including anger, disbelief, disappointment and frustration at whoever did this. My gut wrenched, my shoulders tensed. I mean, how do you choose to just walk away from what is easily $1000 worth of damage that you knowingly caused? “$1000 worth of damage” I repeated out loud. “Who does that?”

Then I chuckled because the words instantly reminded me of an incident that took place almost exactly 1 month ago to the day. On October 16, I was in downtown Tampa working as a Supervisor in Training at The Florida Institute of Hypnotherapy, haven driven my mom’s car into town that day. I was parked in the garage for over 10 hours, and at the end of the day, I came down to find that someone hit my mom’s car in almost the exact same manner. The damage looks nearly identical. $1000 worth of damage. In this case, the person who hit the car, left a very long note punctuated with as many apologies as phone numbers through which to contact her. When I called her that day, the apologies continued. Come to find out she is an attorney in the same building, just two floors down from where I spent the day. She was just so distraught and eager to resolve the situation. I felt so bad for her. She took responsibility but still clearly felt like that wasn’t enough.

I remember feeling that there was no room to be upset or angry or disappointed, there was only compassion for this woman who was clearly suffering over this incident more than me and in a way I could never imagine. It was so easy to be warm, kind, humorous and playful with her on the phone because that’s how compassion moves. And by the end of our discussion, you could hear that her heart was eased and fears assuaged. Everything was going to be okay. .. at least for her. I still had to tell my mom someone hit her car. LOL

If you know me or have worked with me, you will know that I commonly yield to the notion that every behavior – every choice to respond or not to respond, is the safest, most comfortable thing for the subconscious to do in a given moment. This is true for how we act upon ourselves and also how we act upon the world, regardless of how it serves other people or doesn’t serve other people. It is also true for how we, the observer, perceive the behaviors of others – their responses and lack of response. In this situation with the attorney, while her reaction may have seemed over the top in my eyes, it was the safest, most comfortable thing for her – it just so happens that it served me. Now as I turn my attention back to the individual who hit my car this morning, I have to apply the same standard. Driving away, not leaving a note, not reporting the incident was the safest, most comfortable thing for him or her to do. It just so happens, that it did NOT serve me.

And therein lies the lesson, and I now find my body is easily off the hook. All People deserve compassion regardless of their story, guilt, action or inaction. And more important, I can still extend compassion, even if the result does not serve me. The person who hit my car deserves compassion. I don’t know what they have going on. I don’t know what “damage” he or she may have suffered as a child or continues to suffer as an adult. It doesn’t matter. I can still have compassion.

Compassion for others may not be the easiest thing to extend, given that sometimes others do not bring to a situation what appears to you to be their best effort, but it’s the key to moving forward. It’s the key to creating and manifesting positive attention from the universe. Anything less, keeps our bodies and minds locked into a vibration of retribution and restitution. And we know how the universe responds to that.

Does a “$1000 Worth of Damage” to a car even come close to the cost of the damage we inflict upon ourselves and others through withholding compassion? Doesn’t even come close in my book. Somewhere out there, there is person who knows they hit my car today. They know their choice caused another person emotional and financial impact. They know they fled the scene where video surveillance is used. Worse, they will probably be living in fear for the next few weeks of the Sheriff’s office knocking on their door. But still, for him or her, leaving was the safest and most comfortable thing to do. Clearly, he or she is suffering a whole lot more than me. So, I have compassion for this person and send a vibration out the universe to bring them closure and peace.

I am grateful for the universe, for priming me with the lesson last month, so as to be able to extend now to someone NOW the compassion they need and I need to move forward. And I am grateful for my getting better and better at this every day. . . without requiring priming.

And so it is.

To This Day on Vimeo

August 25, 2014 – “To This Day”

This video is truly moving. Painful to watch, especially if you see yourself in any one of the vignettes so eloquently illustrated by the narrator. Beautiful to consider, especially when we see how our true human nature is to thrive despite our past hurts and programming; thrive despite the story we told ourselves and the story others told about us. This is the true power of the work that I am grateful to call my profession — helping people rediscover who they truly are; stoke the embers of their own beliefs, and reignite the flame of their divine existence.



To This Day is a project based on a spoken word poem written by Shane Koyczan ( called “To This Day”, to further explore the profound and lasting impact that bullying can have on an individual. Schools and families are in desperate need of proper tools to confront this problem. We can give them a starting point… A message that will have a far reaching and long lasting effect in confronting bullying. Animators and motion artists brought their unique styles to 20 second segments that will thread into one fluid voice. This collaborative volunteer effort demonstrates what a community of caring individuals are capable of when they come together.,,

May is Older Americans Month

May 15, 2014 — May is Older American Awareness Month. Each year the Administration for Community Living designates a theme for this National Commemorative month and this year’s theme is Fall Prevention. By taking control of their safety, the group believes that older Americans can live longer, healthier lives.

No doubt. Safety is something we should be mindful of at every age. At Disney, we were taught to think about Safety first, so that other’s don’t have to. As such, people of all ages, can live longer, healthier, more enjoyable lives. . .(at their theme parks especially.)

I would like to suggest that, this year, we take the commemoration of Older American’s Awareness Month, one step further. While continuing to be mindful of the areas to promote safety, let us find additional ways to help Older American’s live longer, healthier lives. Now before you go out and grab your closest Older American and take them to the Magic Kingdom, consider three easy, free and low impact ways you can accomplish this objective:

1. Time – In the world of texts, hashtags, likes and plus ones it seems we are trying to pare down communication to as few characters as possible in a virtual time sharing space. Express as much as possible with the least amount of effort as quickly as possible. For many older Americans, who preceded this technology and mindset, their TIME is precious but your TIME with them is worth far more. It’s not about the “characters” on the message. It’s about the “character” of the time you spend – the nature of the time you spend. It’s validating. It’s enriching. It’s fulfilling. It’s healing just to be heard. To perceive that someone values you and your time. Sharing your time makes people happy. So carve out some real time. Put down the phone and the tablet. Engage and invest some time. If you knew it could help someone live longer, and healthier. . would you do it?

2. Love – What looks and feels like love to one, is different for another and the dance to communicate it is like watching two people who speak different languages try to connect on words and phrases like “bathroom” or “cold beer” or “where is my luggage?.” We all know that feeling of struggling to make the expression that translates correctly. We try different words. We experiment with gestures and body language. We draw pictures on napkins. It’s imperative when trying to communicate something you value. We continue trying until we know they other person understands. But somehow, when it comes to expressing love, we have learned that we have the right to give up on our efforts to translate our own behavior and words into something that another person recognizes as love. It’s like we say, well “You just have to accept that this word, this gesture, this act is what love means for ME and learn to associate what you NEED to feel and see every time I do it.” Hmmmmm. That approach would NEVER work for the traveler in a foreign country. He would never find his luggage and chances are, he would alienate a lot of people who were genuinely trying to help him. Alienation is an opposite of Love. So explore the landscape of a foreign country (aka someone else’s love terrain). An Older American’s terrain. Keep trying to communicate the love with as much diligence and intensity as a traveler in a foreign land. If you knew it could help someone live longer, and healthier. . would you make the effort?

3. Tenderness – Handle all hearts with care. Just because some hearts are older, and sometimes hardened and scarred with experience doesn’t mean they are less fragile. Remember, we are all 7 year olds running around in adult bodies. It’s a big masquerade ball and some costumes are a bit more aged than others. But inside, it’s one big party room full of innocence, joy and laughter aching for release. Extend the same compassion and tenderness to your favorite Older American, that you would a child. Extend permission to be a kid and have a child like heart. And here is where Safety is also important — foster the feeling of safety in the expression of all of these feelings. Sometimes, Older American’s aren’t just older and wiser, but they have lived longer with suppressed joy and bliss. Our permission to let them experience the world with childlike bliss and joy, to regard them with tenderness and compassion when they do, makes a world of difference in the quality of life. If you knew handling someone’s heart with care could help them live a happier, healthier life. . . would you?

This is by no means an exhaustive list of what you can to do celebrate your favorite Older American during this commemorative month. No doubt, just being remembered and celebrated will have lasting impact. Just try it. Try something. Try Time, Love and Tenderness. No disrespect to Michael Bolton here. In fact, if you don’t know what I am referring to you definitely must go out and find yourself an Older American to practice these points with. They KNOW the tune and their just waiting for someone to sing with. I promise, you wont regret it. But more important. . they wont forget it, and it may just help someone live a longer, healthier life. And that life. . . in just a few years, may even be your own.

Older Americans Month 2014.